Yesterday I had a meeting with my teacher about my adaptation, and it went amazingly well. Not only does is my professor encouraging me to continue with it, but she seems to really like the idea itself.

I also experienced a huge rush of relief when she said that she didn't think my play was for children- and it didn't have to be. First of all, this is incredibly generous of her, since I am doing this project for my Children's Theatre final; she has every right to force me to make it a kids' peice. I was also glad to hear this because it means I'm not just overestimating the level of emotions and the intensity of the experiences that are in my play. This is not to say that children don't experience these things as well- they certainly do- but the fact is that my play is not for kids. Perhaps ages thirteen and up, but definitely not the younger set.

The other great thing is that my professor knows that this isn't just a class project to me- it's an actual script that, one day, I hope to have produced. I feel like I have her support and that's just a great feeling :)

WIP Wednesday

Okay, this is taking me a lot to post this, as it is my most in-progress work: a segment of a scene from my adaptation. This is the scene that was performed as the first part of my project in February. My play centers around Mary (a.k.a Mrs. Darling) who, like her daughter after her, knew Peter Pan as a girl.


(YOUNG MARY sits on her floor, having a tea party with some of her dolls and stuffed animals. MARY wears a large feathered hat and holds an open parasol with one hand as she pours tea with the other.)

MARY. Another biscuit, Miss Penny? Not so much sugar in your tea, Mr. Meriwether! Miss Carroll, if you desire another cake, you may ask me to pass them to you. Ladies do not reach across the table.

(There is a knock at the door but MARY, absorbed in her play, barely acknowledges it. MRS. LIDDELL enters.)

MARY. Mother! Come have some tea. Miss Carroll is behaving rather badly this afternoon, but I’m sure she’s left some cake for you.

MRS. LIDDELL. Thank you dear, but I’ve had my tea this afternoon.

MARY. Oh, but it’s green tea. The queen herself sent it. She is terribly sorry she could not attend herself, but-

MRS. LIDDELL. Mary, perhaps the tea party could wait for a moment. (She sits on her daughter’s bed and pats the space next to her.) Come sit.

(MARY puts down the teapot and parasol and sits next to her mother.)

MARY. What’s wrong, Mother?

MRS. LIDDELL. Nothing at all. In fact, today is a day of celebration. Do you know what day it is?

MARY. (after thinking for a moment) Wednesday.

MRS. LIDDELL. (laughing) That is true, my dear, but there is something very special about this particular Wednesday. For it was on this day, thirteen short years ago, that I was blessed with the greatest gift a person could get- a little baby named Mary.

(As MRS. LIDDELL has been talking, MARY has grown noticeably downcast. She plays with the skirt of her dress and frowns.)

MRS. LIDDELL. Whatever is the matter, Mary? Aren’t you excited for your birthday?

MARY. No.

MRS. LIDDELL. But why not? You’re thirteen now- a young lady. (She reaches up and removes the hat that Mary is still wearing.) Soon you’ll have your debut and go to lots of beautiful parties, and then, one day, you’ll marry a wonderful man and be a mother just like I am. Don’t you want any of that?

MARY. (stubbornly) No, I do not.

MRS. LIDDELL. You want to stay a little girl forever? What is the fun in that?

MARY. I can have my tea parties and play with my friends. I can make up stories about whatever I like and then act them out. I can have fun.

MRS. LIDDELL. Grown-ups have fun, too, Mary. I have tea parties with real tea and cakes and I spend time with my friends. And we tell each other stories all the time.

MARY. (throwing herself face-down on the bed) It’s not the same!

MRS. LIDDELL. (beginning to lose patience with her daughter) We’ve all got to grow up sometime, Mary, whether we like it or not. You have the choice to cherish it or be miserable, and only you can make that decision.

(MARY doesn’t answer, as she has begun to cry. MRS. LIDDELL gets up, puts the hat on a nearby chair, and exits. MARY continues to cry as the lights change to show the passing of time. It is now evening and MARY is still crying quietly. Suddenly there is a tap at the window. She sits up on her bed and looks its direction, but there doesn’t seem to be anything there. Then comes another tap. MARY gets up and crosses to the window, unlatching it and leaning out to see what made the noise. She doesn’t see anything and makes to go back to her bed, but then through the window flies PETER PAN. MARY turns to see the boy hovering in her window and stares, speechless.)

PETER. Girl, why are you crying?

MARY. (wiping at her still-wet cheeks) I’m not crying.

(PETER flies closer to peer into her eyes and MARY takes a step back.)

PETER. Yes, you are. You’ve got more of those wet things in your eyes. Are you sad? Why?

MARY. (as if it’s obvious) Today is my thirteenth birthday.

PETER. (alighting on a toy chest) What is a “birth day”?

MARY. You don’t know what a birthday is?

PETER. (indignantly) I know lots of other things. I think I do know what a “birth day” is, but I just have a better name for it.

MARY. A birthday is a celebration of the day you were born. You have one every year.

PETER. I’ve never had a birthday.

MARY. Of course you have. Everyone has. How old are you? You ought to have had as many birthdays as you’ve had years of your life.

PETER. I don’t know how old I am. I climbed out of my pram when I was just one day old and ran away to live with fairies. Then I went to Neverland. No one ever told me I had a birthday of my own. I think I’d like one.

MARY. Then you may have one.

PETER. Really? Could you give it to me?

MARY. (after a pause) Only if you tell me about this “Neverland”. You lived there with the fairies?

PETER. No, silly girl! I lived with the fairies before I went to Neverland.

MARY. You are quite a rude boy. If you continue in this manner, I shan’t give you your birthday. (She folds her arms and turns away from him.)

PETER. (flies over her head and landing in front of her again) I’m sorry, girl-

MARY. My name is Mary.

PETER. I’m sorry, Mary. Sometimes I can’t help myself. I’m not clever like you, so I have to pretend I am. Please let me have my birthday!

MARY. Tell me more about Neverland and I’ll think about it.

PETER. Neverland is a place where pirates and Indians fight on the open sea while mermaids swim below. Where fairies flit about in the air like dancing lights and there is never a day without adventure. It is a place where you never have to grow up.

(Now he has MARY’s attention.)

MARY. You never have to grow up?

PETER. Never.

MARY. My mother says everyone’s got to grow up.

PETER. Your mother?

MARY. Yes.

PETER. Well, what does she know?

MARY. She must know something. After all, she did it herself.

PETER. Yes, but she chose to grow up, which means she knows nothing about fun. If she did, she would have stayed a child, wouldn’t she?

MARY. (thinking) I suppose you’re right. Whenever I watch grown-ups, they never seem to be enjoying themselves. Maybe they just never knew what fun was and so weren’t sad to grow up. (Beat) But I know about fun, and I don’t want to leave it behind. (Beat) Could I go to Neverland?

PETER. Only if you give me my birthday.

MARY. All right, then. Close your eyes.

(PETER does. MARY looks around, uncertain of what could be representative of a birthday. Finding nothing, she thinks for a moment. Then she steps up to PETER, snaps her fingers twice and then makes a motion as if cracking an egg on top of his head, letting her fingers run over his hair.)

MARY. There. Now you’ve got your birthday.

PETER. (smiling brightly) It feels wonderful to have a birthday! Does this mean ours are on the same day?

MARY. (realising that this is true) I suppose so.

PETER. We will have great fun celebrating them together in Neverland. Are you ready to go?

MARY. I’m really going?

PETER. Of course. But only if you hurry. (He runs to the windowsill and jumps up) Come on!

(He holds out his hand. MARY hesitates, looking around her lavish room. She considers what she would be leaving behind by going with Peter. Then she takes PETER’s hand and steps up with him.)

MARY. Let’s go.

Just Do It!

That's something I have trouble with in life... actually making the move to do something. I'm fine musing over all the "what-if"s, good and bad. I like to make plans. I like to talk over my options with other people. But actually embarking on a task? Not so easy for me. I am the queen of cold feet. Most of the time, I work through them and get on with whatever I need to do, but sometimes, I don't always pull through or, worse, I decide I do want to do whatever it is and realize that I waited too long and it's too late.

My proposal for the Peter Pan project is due on Monday. The form we have to turn in is actually quite simple and I could have it filled out by now, ready to hand to my teacher. But I wanted to get a better feel for what I wanted/needed first. I sat around and thought. I went to the park and thought. I went on Facebook a lot and stopped thinking for awhile and then I thought again.

Thinking is a wonderful and essential step in writing, but there is an even more important step that, had people not taken it, would have resulted in no books being written- ACTION! Though I was thinking a lot, I was too scared to put anything down in a document. I am so afraid of failure in this project that I just did a lot of staring when I brought up a blank page. I collected a good amount of research, which helped me a lot and gave me invaluable peeks into my characters, but what if I tried to apply that knowledge and it fell flat?

So I didn't actually write any more of the script until today. After slacking into the early afternoon, I finally got my stuff together and went to my school library to work. Really, I need to get out of my room sometimes to write. I just get too comfortable there, too familiar with my surroundings. I need stimulation in the form of a new location every now and then.

And I actually wrote some stuff! It's been slow going, as the lurking fear of failure pops up at me at every turn like that fuzzy orange monster in the Weight Watchers commercials. It's also a little bit harder due to the period language- finding the right word to go certain places without going modern.

But as scared as I am, I really want to write this adaptation. I want to share it with my class and my teacher. And- dare I admit it? One day, in the far future... I want to mount it on the stage. Obviously, this will take a lot of work- even just making it good enough in my eyes to show my class is going to take a lot of work. But I'm passionate enough about this project to do it.

However Many You Discover, There is Always One More.

This will be a short post, as I'm in the throes of writing, but since I have lamented much about this project, I'll give you an update:

The adaptation decision actually made itself. Though, because I'm me, I'm still constantly worried it's the wrong one, the signs were there. The Sleeping Beauty one is still something I want to work on over the summer, but whenever I went to work on either of the adaptations, I always opened up Peter Pan. As I've said, I really love my premise and it keeps drawing me in.

So I've been taking a lot of notes in my new found free time (I was cast in another student film, this time at my own school, and was supposed to be filming now, but some location scouting was not well planned out and so I have the afternoon off. First shots tonight!) I've been using both Barrie's play and his novel, and though I've read both in full, recently, I am finding some true gold in these rereadings, wonderful stuff I overlooked before this plot was created. I'll leave you with a few that are really feeding my inspiration:

"He got all of her, except the innermost box and the kiss." (If I had to choose a tagline for this project at the moment, it would be this.)

"Her romantic mind was like the tiny boxes, one within the other, that come from the puzzling East, however many you discover, there is always one more."

"Children have the strangest adventures without being troubled by them."

Making Choices

You know that artist (and by "artist" I mean writer/actor/painter/director/any other art form) phrase "kill your babies"? If you don't, it basically means that though a person loves an idea or a creation or what have you, sometimes you just have to leave it behind, nix it from the program, or realise that it's just not realistic.

I've killed a few of my babies (God, that sounds so morbid) in years past, and I find myself in a similar situation right now. I don't really have to kill my baby, but I do have to choose one over the other and I have to do it, like, yesterday.

My final is coming up in Children's Theatre, and instead of choosing a normal project like profiling a children's playhouse or chronicling the history of a popular show, I've decided to be crazy and either continue with one adaptation or write a completely new one... all for my final presentation in a month. A month seems like a long time, but I need to choose my project by this weekend because we have conferences about the project in two weeks and I need to have something to show.

So, my two choices:

1) Create an new adaptation premise for a fairy tale and present the story, visuals, and script excerpt.

or

2) Continue with my Peter Pan adaptation and, since I've already done the above for this project, write enough of the script to fill a ten to fifteen minute time slot, in which I will do a sort of staged reading.

There are pros and cons to each of these choices, and I'm having a really hard time figuring out which I should do. So, because you totally care (and I need to hash it out for myself), here are the pros and cons to each:


NEW FAIRY TALE (Sleeping Beauty):

PROS

-Because it's a well-known fairy tale, I have a strong foundation plot.
-Have a nice skeleton of a new version of the plot already, as it's based on an improv I did when I was being a camp counselor last summer.
-I'm finding it quite easy to set it in modern times.
-I could probably pull off a pretty good presentation.
-It's looking like it'll be a comedy, and I enjoy writing comedy.
-I like the plot enough that I may continue with it afterwards.

CONS

-I want to do a script excerpt and I have no idea which scene is stand-alone enough to present.
-Obviously, nothing but the plot is written yet, as I just started tonight.
-I'm not sure if it'll turn out to be for young kids, which might be a problem if I find this out two weeks before the project is due.


PETER PAN ADAPTATION:

PROS

-I really like my premise and I'm going to write this play, whether I do it it for class or not.
-I have the skeleton of a plot.
-The class has already seen my presentation of the basic plot, so I can just expand.
-I get to write more of the script.
-I had a nice talk with my teacher and basically asked her if she thought the plot was even worth developing. She said yes and gave me a lot of great suggestions.
-With her guidance, I have ideas of how to make it more of a children's piece than the more high-school-kids-and-up way it was going before.
-Though it's not modern day, I know the era I'm setting it in (Victorian) very well, and definitely well enough to set a play there.
-It's a drama and I like writing drama.
-I lurve staged readings and would looooove to stage one myself.

CONS

-I don't want to bore the class with the same play they already know.
-I'm worried I won't be able to come up with good enough new material to show them.
-It's really, really, REALLY dramatic.
-I care so much about this project that failure might be devastating.


Augh, I don't know! Anyone out there have any opinions?!

When I Least Expected It... Success!

In two areas!

This morning, my Children's Theatre teacher gave us back our Peter Pan adaptation projects. I really wanted it, but she's doing so much in addition to her teaching that I didn't know if we'd ever get them back. But this morning, we finally did! She said she is going to send us our grades through e-mail but that she had written some comments on the papers we had given her. I had handed in a nice, covered copy and flipped through it... no comments. I was rather upset. But then I thought to check the copy that was just stapled, which I had given to the second judge. Lo and behold- comments! Only two, but they were both great. She really like the vocabulary I chose for George and Mary Darling, both, particularly the lines, "Your sister is the very embodiment of sloth," and "The verdure of England is hardly my chief concern at the moment." I was happy to see this comment because, as I stated before, I like to give characters their own ways of speaking.
The second comment was the one that made me happiest- at the end of the rewrite of that terrible scene that gave me so much trouble, she wrote, "What a great rewrite!" and underlined it four times. Hooray!!!

A non-writing success surprise: after eight months of being without a real production to act in, I was cast in a student film yesterday! I am soooo excited, especially since it's something completely different from anything I've ever done before (a slasher film, in which I play a violently raised, murderous teenager.) I'm not exactly sure what this film will entail besides four days of filming- I haven't gotten the script or the shooting schedule yet. But I can't wait to get started!

Finally Cooking!

At last! My terrible, horrible bout of writer's block has broken! And none too soon, because the project the scene is part of is due on Monday! I am not actually using the trouble scene as part of my presentation, though I do have to turn in an edited version.

The breakage happened on Wednesday. We had sort of a work day in class and so for about half the class, I just read over everything I had that related to the project- the two scenes I had written, all the notes I had taken, my page of random thoughts about the Peter Pan story as a whole and what could be done with it... and then something clicked. One peice fell into place, then another. The brainstoriming I did with my friend Kara the other night really helped me create a skeleton of the synopsis. I formed ideas, rejected them, brought them back and remolded them, cast other ideas aside. Instead of getting hung up on the questions, I made a note that there were questions and moved on. Our teacher had given us permission to leave early if we wanted, but I stayed the entire time until I was one of only three people sitting in the classroom, writing and writing without any distractions. Then yesterday, I took all the notes I had made and typed them up, filling in the holes and answering the questions as I went. And now I feel pretty good abuot the project. I wish I were further along, but it's merely technical reasons (the library being closed and not having my own printer) that I'm not. But I'm actually excited about my presentation on Monday :)

More Frustration

I should know how to do this. I've been writing plays since I was seven years old. But now, suddenly, I'm faced with the prospect of writing a scene- one scene- based on or inspired by material that's been around for over a hundred years, and I can't do it!

This is so frustrating. That little cursor that begins a blank page has been blinking at me all day. Though we only have to write one scene, we have to approach this project as if we're being commissioned to write an entire play, so we need to have a general synopsis. I talked it over with my friend Kara, who had read the scene I've complained about in previous posts, and she helped me sort out the ideas I already had and also extracted some extra stuff from the scene, as well as giving suggestions over her own.

Now I sort of have an idea of what I want to do... but only sort of. I wish I would just stop thinking so hard over this.

Ughhh

It's probably best that I waited to write this entry, because I was too upset to write well earlier this week.

What am I talking about? What else- the scene for Children's Theatre. The experience is all coming back to me as I type up my weekly reflection, which includes a question about what we gained from the assignment. I feel bad wrting "nothing", because that's not true at all and it makes it seem like a bad assignment. It wasn't a bad assignment; my writing just sucked. Seriously. I am not being modest or anything- it was bad.

Okay, I'm not being modest, but I may be being a little dramatic. My writing wasn't terrible, I guess. There were parts of my scene that I was proud of, like how I matched the style of dialogue with Barrie's (to the point where my roommate, who is also in the class, asked me if it was an excerpt from the play. Unfortunately, she hadn't really meant it as a compliment.) I was also proud of how I revealed the big "surprise" of the scene, which could easily have been extremely soap opera-y and dramatic, but I worked for literally hours crafting that one line to make it both chilling and undramatic (is that a word?)

However, nicely crafted dialogue and subtley revealed secrets only make for great scenes when you fill the requirements of the scene. I failed so badly that it still brings tears to my eyes. I just don't know what to do to understand this stuff. I would love to be a playwright, but if I can't understand the concept of the dialectic, how can I do that?

I have always been really protective of my writing. Well, maybe not always- I was quite a confident little kid and had a reputation as a good writer in elementary and most of middle school. But when I got to eighth grade and was accepted into a tough advanced writing class, I realised that there were people better than me and I kind of shut down and became very secretive about my writing. To this day, there are only a few people to whom I show my writing.

So in Children's Theatre, we were asked to write a two-person scene that, in the course of the action, involves a change one or both of the characters' worldview. I have been working on this scene since at least Friday morning. I finally, finally finished it this morning with the help of my mom (who I have never, ever shown my writing to). I am so relieved it's done, but I don't know how good it is. I've actually shed tears over this scene. It not really because I think my writing is bad, but because I'm feeling the pressure of having it read in front of not only my teacher, but her playwrighting teacher. I hope it's all right...


On another note, Melissa is having a nifty contest on her blog, so check it out!

Learning to Adapt

I have mentioned before my Children's Theatre and I will probably talk about it occasionally for the next few months because WOW do I love it! It's funny that I say that because I was quite scared of children's theatre before, thinking it a scary, foreign animal of acting. But in addition to finding out that it is, in fact, no such thing, I am also loving the class so much because we're talking about writing and adaptation.



Adaptation is something I've been interested in since... before I knew what it was. It's natural for children to mimick, and naturally I gravitated toward my favorite stories. As I grew older and continued to be an avid reader, I found myself wanting to play certain characters from the books I devoured, and this led me to adapt the stories.



In the past few years, there are certain books that really jump out at me for adaptation. The biggest one is For Freedom, by Kimberly Brubaker Bradley. I have a half-written screenplay based off of it and one day, I would love to get the rights to truly adapt it (I think it would make a wonderful stage play as well as movie; I'd love to do both, but especially the stage version.)


I always thought this dream was one that I'd secretly stew over, secretly and illegally adapting bits and peices of novels into plays that would never be mounted on a stage. But this class is showig me that perhaps I can actually do this- and what a wonderful class to discover this in! Our teacher is a produced and published playwright herself, so who better to teach us about the subject? I have a new hope about what I can do... and maybe one day, I'll just succeed :)